This week’s Kutuby Learning blog talks about how you can navigate this holiday season as a Muslim family.
If the holiday season evokes feelings of warmth, love, and cosy evenings of connecting with your loved ones, you are not alone. If the feelings are also combined with anxiousness and dread at having to deal with the overwhelming bombardment of Christmas cheer at your Muslim family, you are definitely not alone.
Every year, starting with Halloween, and leading all the way up to the New Year, practicing Muslims living in the West, are treated to an increasingly difficult task of navigating the “most wonderful time of the year” with their families. Those with young children, even more so. From Trick o Treating to Secret Santa at school, it can be incredibly tough for Muslim parents to manage the festive vibes of the season while still maintaining basic Islamic principles surrounding the celebration of non-Islamic holidays.
Here is what you can do to traverse the holiday season without too much talk about, “they do it, why can’t we?”
Highlight why we don’t Celebrate Christmas
As Muslims, our imaan does not accept the faith of the trinity, hence it is important to explain to our children that it is not permissible in Islam to celebrate Christmas. At the young age of anywhere between one and half to two years old, a child begins to develop a sense of identity. It is a period where they begin to recognise their name and what background they belong to.
At the age of two years, it is a possibility that a child may consider any man with a beard as a Muslim, however that will make them think that Santa is also a Muslim. Therefore, basic education and differentiation at a young age is important.
Discuss Christmas Accordingly to Age
Children go through different stages where their sense of understanding is constantly evolving. Use the right ways to show them how our holidays are different from other holidays according to their level of comprehension. For instance, here is what Kutuby Learning suggests according to the following groups.
Toddlers (18 months-2 years):
As the city streets are covered in lights and all sorts of things, it attracts the mind of a child. You can admire the street lights with them but do casually mention that we don’t celebrate Christmas, rather we celebrate Eid which is more fun.
Pre-School (2.5-5 years):
As mentioned above, children may recognize Santa as a Muslim due to his beard. However, at this time, let them know that Santa is an imaginary character. He does not come down the chimney for milk and cookies at night. Nor does he send us presents. We celebrate Eid together.
School Age (6-9 years):
At this age, children begin to grasp deeper concepts like life, death, and the afterlife. This presents a better opportunity to gently guide children towards Islam. Use this time to read to them stories about the prophets, Prophet Isa in particular. Explain subtly how we believe in him as a beloved messenger of Allah.
Pre-teens (10-11 years):
If you have worked hard during the previous years, your children will have a basic understanding of why we do not partake in the conventional holidays. It is highly encouraged to have open and honest discussions about any questions they may have and not to shame them if they feel like they are missing out on the festivities. Plan a family outing where you can all enjoy as a family away from the bustle of the season. Read this blog to know what you can do this holiday season with your Muslim family!
Adolescence (12-14 years):
This is quite a sensitive time as teens must be treated with plenty of love and respect despite any difficulties they may face regarding their Islamic beliefs. Rather than enforce rules on them blindly, put efforts into strengthening your bond with your children. The rest will follow, inshallah!
Be Mindful
It is necessary to be mindful of what you do on Christmas. For instance, if you are a convert and wish to seek your family only for the sake of Allah SWT on Christmas, take care of your actions.
Exchanging presents, playing board games and having a meal together, provided that it is halal and does not involve haram elements is fine, as these actions do not contradict our faith. Attending Mass at church, chanting religious prayers or songs, or worshipping Jesus, however, would all be impermissible.
Stay Respectful, Establish Honour, and Peace
While impermissible to celebrate, one must remain respectful and respect others despite their beliefs.
The Qur’an clearly specifies this,
“O mankind, We have created you male and female, and appointed you races and tribes, that you may know one another. Surely the noblest among you in the sight of God is the most god-fearing of you. God is All-knowing, All-aware.” – Qur’an 49:13
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ would promote tolerance and peace. He would inspire and influence generations to come and therefore, maintained a sense of compassion. He also laid the foundation for legal rights and protection for non-Muslims. As our neighbours and acquaintances are preparing for Christmas celebrations, we emphasize on respecting their traditions and keeping the harmony of inter-religious brotherhood. .
These were some of our suggestions on how we can navigate the holiday season as a Muslim family. Be sure to practically apply these tips and let us know if this blog was helpful or not. We’ll see you again next week InshAllah!
